Some Recent Discoveries in the Benedetto Household

Karen and her parents have learned a lot in the past few months. Here's a sampling.

1. "No, Karen, that washcloth does not go in the toilet."
2. "No, Karen, even if you find a creative way to get up onto the table, you still can't play on it."
3. Soap doesn't taste good.
4. Karen's sippy-cup does fit inside Mommy's full glass of water. *splash*
5. Orange crayons don't taste very good.
6. "No, Karen, Mommy's headband does NOT go in the toilet."
7. If you flirt enough with the people at the next table in the restaurant, they will give you their free kiddie toys, if they don't have kids.
8. Soap doesn't taste any better the second time.
9. Blue crayons don't taste any better than orange crayons.
10. If Mommy lets Karen brush Mommy's teeth, Karen will splash toothpaste all over Mommy's face.
11. If Mommy lets Karen splash toothpaste all over Mommy's face, Karen will let Mommy actually brush Karen's teeth.
12. "No, Karen, we don't color the window sill orange!"
13. "NO, KAREN, even if you try to color the window sill faster as Mommy chases you, she'll still take the crayon away when she catches you."
14. A very pregnant Mommy can't chase Karen as quickly as she used to.
15. Jumping up (at 8 months pregnant) to chase Karen is a lot harder than it used to be.
16. Hey, look, the window sill is very orange lately.
17. Washing pen marks out of clothes isn't that hard.
18. "No, Karen, that infant bouncy seat is for the new baby."
19. Wow! Karen's learned to say "Mama, stduk!" when she gets stuck in the infant bouncy seat.
20. If Karen walks sideways for a while, she will get Mommy and Daddy to laugh.
21. "NO, KAREN! Mommy's bras DO NOT GO IN THE TOILET!!!"
22. Purple crayons really don't taste any better than blue crayons.
23. If Karen has a bag a raisins in her carseat and you hear *shake-shake* and Daddy can't grab it in time, you will have raisins all over the back seat of your car.
24. Karen has somehow picked up a Boston accent that you can hear when she says the letter "R" and the words "car" and "star".
25. A toddler views a baby gate around something not as a deterrent, but as a fascinating challenge requiring all her time, efforts, and attention.
26. Hey, I can fit my index fingers up both nostrils at the same time!
27. Any time Karen does something funny like that, she will giggle like crazy but will have stopped before her parents can get the camera out. (Sorry, no pictures.)
28. If you ignore a toddler with her fingers shoved halfway up her sinuses, she will stop doing it sooner or later.
29. Reading Goodnight Moon six million times will cause Mommy's brain to shut down.
30. Daddy reads Goodnight Moon a lot these days.
31. If Wheel of Forture comes on TV, Karen gets frustrated because the contestants won't choose "O" even though she's yelling at them to pick "O".
32. Karen has a shadow!
33. An 18-month-old sounds very cute when she says "toilet paper".
34. "YES, Karen, toilet paper DOES go in the toilet."
35. Karen's shadow won't stop following her no matter how concerned she gets.
36. (Recent re-dicovery) People in public still give rude stares and dirty looks to very pregnant women.
37. Apparently, people in public still think Danielle is a 13-year-old pregnant teenager.
38. People in public have no problem making comments to pregnant women like, "Wow, you're really HUGE! You must be due in a couple days." (Note: that's an exact quote, from a total stranger to Danielle at only seven months pregnant.)
39. Karen has learned that the name of Aunt Tricia's and Uncle Jeromy's new baby will be "Chris".
40. Karen thinks Mommy's and Daddy's new baby's name is "Chris".
41. Mommmy and Daddy try with all their might to convince Karen that the new baby's name will be "Amy", if it really is a girl.
42. Karen no longer solemnly states that the baby's name is "Chris". Instead, she giggles hysterically as she pats Mommy's belly and calls the baby "Chris".

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